TNT showing the 25th in the series of Geico "caveman commercials." I've decided those commercials could be used as a universal IQ test. If you laugh, you're sent back to the remedial grades.
Tracy McGrady has been diagnosed with a "hip pointer." He's back in the game now. Basically I just heard the announcers say "McGrady faked it."
Fun Fact: Ecdysiastic is the latin word for pole dancing.
Fisher just pivoted with the ball for roughly 15 seconds before passing the ball. That was productive. Lord knows moving your left foot back and forth might make your defender fall over. Oh wait, Harpring is on our team.
Fratello reports that Jerry Sloan told him "Harpring knows how to get his points in our offense." Graciously cuts off the rest of the quote: "by sacrificing his teammates shots, playing selfishly, and always calling for the ball regardless of defensive coverage."
TNT runs a playoff promo featuring 50% images of D-Wade and Shaq. OOPS!
Giricek hits another 3. Jerry Sloan plants his head firmly in the sand.
Mehmet Okur's 3 point percentage in this series is Shawn Bradley-esque.
Harpring passed. Isn't that precious!
Harpring slips on invisible banana peel.
Close-up on McGrady's "I'm in pain!" face. Funny how losing two games in a row leads to injury for T-Mac. Of course ESPN will still trumpet him as one of the greatest playoff performers ever despite his playoff series record still being 0-for-career.
12 combined turnovers already. Fratello is still describing the teams as playing "crisp fundamental basketball."
Fisher hits a three-pointer. TNT commentators talking about how great he is. This confirms my theory that Mike Fratello has been in cryogenic storage since 1999.
How many suits do you think Craig Sager owns? Do you think he tries to top his previous high in bad taste with every new purchase? What are the odds it's all an elaborate joke and he just has one blue suit and the producers blue-screen horrific colors and patterns on him without his knowledge every game? These are the things I need the New York Times to cover.
TNT shows a "Hertz around the league" graphic. I'm very disappointed this isn't an injury update.
Current injury report: Tracy McGrady - wounded pride.
Juwan Howard suddenly outperforming all expectations that were set from the last several games. Documented receipts from Floyd Landis' pharmacist ordered shredded by Jeff Van Gundy.
Mehmet Okur hits a dagger three. Celebrates by planning first shower this month.
Tracy McGrady already has 9 assists. Funny how it's easier to get those when your teammates start hitting shots.
Kirilenko takes a shot. I think it missed but Masha just thinks it needs an interpreter.
McGrady misses poorly. Fratello defends it by saying "that was not a shot!" I couldn't agree more.
Craig Sager's tie just got him indicted at the Hague.
I'd tell you what Tracy McGrady's arm tattoo says, but I decided it would take less time to read "War and Peace"
Passing the torch on to Bordy for the 3rd quarter. Madame Kicky is ready to gnaw my arm off if I don't go buy food right now.
Showing posts with label playoffs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label playoffs. Show all posts
Monday, April 30, 2007
Live Blog and the Sorcerer's Stone
Prior to this game the TNT studio crew are busy talking about a far more interesting series: Cleveland v. Washington. This despite the fact that Barkley talked about that he doesn't like series that end in sweeps
Jeff Van Gundy just gave commentary about something involving coaching. I'd tell you what he said but I was too fascinated by his appearance. He looked like a recovering methadone addict on a 48 hour crack binge.
Boozer's acne level is at Purplish red.
Mike Fratello comments that Harpring has been playing "above his head" in this series. Not hard to do when your head is normally at floor level from falling over so much.
Battier misses a three. Hot Dog juice spills everywhere.
Tracy McGrady drives right past Derek Fisher to get to the rim, but gets an MLA after getting a contact high from Fisher the last couple game and absorbing his MLA-Superpowers.
Boozer tries to shoot through Yao's arms. Shocked to discover the Chinaman isn't intangible or building a railroad through the American West.
Fisher hacks Yao Ming and raises his hand to signal he fouled him. You know, in case the officials confuse him for that other black guy from Utah.
Kirilenko grabbing several early rebounds. Harpring scrambling madly for his Russian voodoo doll.
Fisher attempts to charge through three Rockets. Falls over instead. On the positive side that allows him to blow his coverage on the other end and let McGrady score an easy three.
Fisher picks up a charging foul and spills Hot Dog Juice all over the floor in the process.
Just showed a Toyota commercial where a Tacoma survives a mauling by a monster truck. Too Bad. I was rooting for the monster truck. Anything that looks like a dinosaur and eats metal vaguely reminds me of mom.
Madame Kicky is bitching to one of her friends about the evils of diet pills. My favorite blast: "We'll see if it works....when you're dead!"
New Favorite when the phone call was ending: "Goodbye...perhaps forever!"
Kirilenko gts a crazy block against Yao. The struggle for the ball was reminiscient of Mongolia stuck between the Russians and the Chinese.
Gordan Giricek hits an open three. Imagine if that guy was our starting shooting guard!
Fratello praising the value of the deflections statistic. Matt Harpring leads the league in dribbling off his foot in traffic, but no mention is made if that counts towards deflections or not.
Mutombo makes the "Harpring deflection" out of bounds. Fratello's giving him a hustle point.
I love that Deron Williams has some variation of his name tattooed on each arm. You know...in case he forgets.
TNT showing highlights from game 3 and 4 and have somehow made the film look old even though it was only a few days ago. I was half expecting George Mikan to throw down a dunk in that grainy footage.
McGrady drives to the hoop at will. Someday he may figure out that no one can stop him when he does that.
TNT switches to some bizarre camera angle that can only be described as "viewpoint of a drunk guy in Section 321."
Holy crap, this game is actually looking like both teams may score 90+ points.
Tracy McGrady's back is sore. John Amaechi unavailable for comment.
Harpring dribbles off his knee brace and commits a turnover. In fairness, the brace is roughly the size of a large baby. Good thing we have the brace signed for 3 more seasons after this one.
Jeff Van Gundy just gave commentary about something involving coaching. I'd tell you what he said but I was too fascinated by his appearance. He looked like a recovering methadone addict on a 48 hour crack binge.
Boozer's acne level is at Purplish red.
Mike Fratello comments that Harpring has been playing "above his head" in this series. Not hard to do when your head is normally at floor level from falling over so much.
Battier misses a three. Hot Dog juice spills everywhere.
Tracy McGrady drives right past Derek Fisher to get to the rim, but gets an MLA after getting a contact high from Fisher the last couple game and absorbing his MLA-Superpowers.
Boozer tries to shoot through Yao's arms. Shocked to discover the Chinaman isn't intangible or building a railroad through the American West.
Fisher hacks Yao Ming and raises his hand to signal he fouled him. You know, in case the officials confuse him for that other black guy from Utah.
Kirilenko grabbing several early rebounds. Harpring scrambling madly for his Russian voodoo doll.
Fisher attempts to charge through three Rockets. Falls over instead. On the positive side that allows him to blow his coverage on the other end and let McGrady score an easy three.
Fisher picks up a charging foul and spills Hot Dog Juice all over the floor in the process.
Just showed a Toyota commercial where a Tacoma survives a mauling by a monster truck. Too Bad. I was rooting for the monster truck. Anything that looks like a dinosaur and eats metal vaguely reminds me of mom.
Madame Kicky is bitching to one of her friends about the evils of diet pills. My favorite blast: "We'll see if it works....when you're dead!"
New Favorite when the phone call was ending: "Goodbye...perhaps forever!"
Kirilenko gts a crazy block against Yao. The struggle for the ball was reminiscient of Mongolia stuck between the Russians and the Chinese.
Gordan Giricek hits an open three. Imagine if that guy was our starting shooting guard!
Fratello praising the value of the deflections statistic. Matt Harpring leads the league in dribbling off his foot in traffic, but no mention is made if that counts towards deflections or not.
Mutombo makes the "Harpring deflection" out of bounds. Fratello's giving him a hustle point.
I love that Deron Williams has some variation of his name tattooed on each arm. You know...in case he forgets.
TNT showing highlights from game 3 and 4 and have somehow made the film look old even though it was only a few days ago. I was half expecting George Mikan to throw down a dunk in that grainy footage.
McGrady drives to the hoop at will. Someday he may figure out that no one can stop him when he does that.
TNT switches to some bizarre camera angle that can only be described as "viewpoint of a drunk guy in Section 321."
Holy crap, this game is actually looking like both teams may score 90+ points.
Tracy McGrady's back is sore. John Amaechi unavailable for comment.
Harpring dribbles off his knee brace and commits a turnover. In fairness, the brace is roughly the size of a large baby. Good thing we have the brace signed for 3 more seasons after this one.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
SL Media in Playoffs Mode
Matt Harpring, Playoffs Warrior:
In fact, AI in the Magic/Sixers series:
FG%: 44.4
PPG: 28.25
RPG: 3.75
APG: 6
SPG: 4 (including 10 in Game Three)
AI in the 1998/1999 season:
FG%: 41.2
PPG: 22.0
RPG: 4.9
APG: 4.6
SPG: 2.3
So AI scored 6.25 more points per game on substantially better shooting while also passing and stealing the ball at a higher rate. To be fair, Harpring cut back on his rebounding.
It's rather sad when SLMedia is actually rewriting history to make their favorite players look better. Judging from the stats, I would think Orlando traded Harp to Philly to try and get someone that could guard.
"Once the ball gets thrown up, it becomes basketball again," forward Matt Harpring said. "You know, these guys have played in a lot of games, and we've played in a lot of tough games. So I just don't think that's going to be that big of an issue."That first game against Orlando, Iverson scored 30 points with 5 rebounds and 7 assists.
He should know.
In Harpring's first playoff game as a rookie for Orlando, he was assigned to guard Philadelphia's Allen Iverson. That worked out so well the Sixers later traded for Harpring, helping cement his reputation as a tough player perfectly built for the crucible of the playoffs.
But will the Jazz have anybody shine the same way?
In fact, AI in the Magic/Sixers series:
FG%: 44.4
PPG: 28.25
RPG: 3.75
APG: 6
SPG: 4 (including 10 in Game Three)
AI in the 1998/1999 season:
FG%: 41.2
PPG: 22.0
RPG: 4.9
APG: 4.6
SPG: 2.3
So AI scored 6.25 more points per game on substantially better shooting while also passing and stealing the ball at a higher rate. To be fair, Harpring cut back on his rebounding.
It's rather sad when SLMedia is actually rewriting history to make their favorite players look better. Judging from the stats, I would think Orlando traded Harp to Philly to try and get someone that could guard.
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