Golden State at Utah: Quarter the First

-Just so you know, I'm taking a break from reading for class to liveblog this game. Here, let me give you a taste of what I'm currently reading:

If there is a bridge between life and mind abstractionists rarely cross it. They feel no need to. They are certain that what lies on the other side is only a reflection of their present position. All too often substantialists prove them right, for when they cross the bridge they generally find what they set out to find, namely, a life that reflected the mind.

/Christopher Morris, Becoming Southern

In other words, there are worse things out there than watching Jason Hart run the break.

-Good Scott, I've missed Boler, shaved hands and all. He's the pretentious uncle that talks out his ass about subjects of which he has no knowledge I never had.

-First double-double reference of the night, game hasn't even started.

-OK, in order, the Jazz game is brought to you by GMC, Toyota, Big O Tires, Geico, and the Worker's Compensation Fund. Sounds like a process.

-Ronnie Price just mentioned he "still sleeps with a basketball some times" and "his girlfriend doesn't like that." I'm more concerned for the basketball.

-Remember The Royal Tenenbaums? Remember how everyone told you that was the greatest movie ever? Remember how you said you thought it seemed well-made but didn't do anything for you? Remember how they then told you you just didn't get the movie? That's how I feel about Deron Williams.
Ha, how delightfully quirky.

-Utah loses the tip, leading 0-0.

-Boozer is trying to play defense by not shifting his feet and instead hopping bunny-like with arms outstretched. Still more effective than Harp.

-AK with a nice move, grabs the ball, pump-fakes, slips, falls into the opponent, and then throws the ball off the bottom of the backboard, and gets called for a travel. Hornacek calls his travel agent, gets tickets back to Phoenix.

-AK with his first jumper of the season. Also with his first confidence.

-AK immediately follows with a lazy TO. Confidence back down to zero. Sloan heaves a sigh of relief.

-Boler with another classic example of strange voice modulation after AK hits a jumper. "That additional work with the...[long pause]...SHOT DOCTOR paying off." I hope he doesn't think he just successfully coined another nickname. After all, it would have to be something like Money Shot Doctor.

-Jazz down 9, 6:35 to go, Timeout. In completely unrelated news, I smell smoke. Be right back.

-OK, the apartment's not on fire. MUST BE THE WARRIORS.

Hahahahaha...Wes Anderson would have thought that was funny.

-Lost my feed for a sec, Bordy's narrating.

‹bordelais8› jazz stand around, bewildered on defense as their opponent keeps launching shots that appear to not be layups

Sounds accurate enough.

-Boxscore says Hart just checked in. I think my IP was just launching a preemptive strike.

-Harpring in.

SWAN!

-DOWN GOES DAVIS.

Matt Harpring just toughed the hell out of him.

-Y'know, I can pretty much do this liveblog without a video feed. Jazz stand around on defense, Harpring's cutting around yelling "woot," baskets are exchanged. And so on and so forth.

-Feed back, first words I hear are (in an admiring tone): "Matt Harpring." Then Boler proceeds to gush man love.

-Boler: *interrupting Boone's Harp love* "And he has attitude!"
Boone: *somewhat dejectedly* "And he has attitude..."
*pause*
"A tough attitude!"

I'm sure there were nods all around.

-Harpring is doing quite well for himself. 5 shots in 3 minutes. Must still be recovering.

-Was going to add another picture making fun of Baron Davis, did a Google Image Search for "eggs in headbands." Nothing good came of it, though somebody knitted some adorable little outfits for some eggs.

-Ronnie Brewer just hit a 3. First, that was unexpected. Second, bet he gets subbed next stoppage in play.

-3 seconds left in the quarter, Harp can shoot two more times.

-29-28, Jazz, and Phase Three of Project Status Quo is initiating. Farewell, AK. Hello, Harp.