Third leg in a four-man relay. I'm used to this position. Ran the third leg on school relay teams. That's where they stick the slowest guy. I'll try to avoid any "baton" analogies, especially with Kicky behind me and Capt. Pearl in front of me.
Bordy Playoff "It's Electric!" Voltage Check: I think I've got just enough juice to provide backup power to a solar-powered calculator.
For those who have never live-blogged before, you might not appreciate just how exhausting it can be. Trying to be witty for a half hour straight is not all that simple, even for Wit Personified. Fortunately, all I have to do is report the facts, as the Jazz provide enough laughs to feed an army of humor-starved fans, simply by showing up and letting Sloan work his magic. Even when it's the same jokes over and over. And over. *sigh*
I'll be following the game on TNT, but might stick with KJZZ for the first couple of minutes so that I can catch Boler ejaculate a "double-double!" as he scrambles for stats ranking Boozer among the best double-doublers in the 2007 playoffs. Meanwhile, as Craig is giggling over Carlos' statistical dominance ("Is that an impressive feat, ten things in two items?"), Boozer will let Rafer drive by for a half-heartedly-contested layup.
By my estimation, AK will play about 40 more minutes in a Jazz uniform. Only 20 of which will actually count, as the other 20 will be spent in the Jazz' offensive half.
Ty Corbin asked about half-time adjustments. He supresses a smirk as he thinks to himself "Jazz? Adjustments?", and proceeds to pile on the BS. He'll do great things in the Jazz organization.
And here we go...
AK with 4 fouls already. Sloan leaves him in so that he can wow us with his offense. AK airballs a 3. I can hear Jerry giggling on the sideline.
Kirilenko fires back by refusing to play real defense, and he hops around harmlessly in front of a Yao shot. Like a cute little bunny rabbit that knows it's about to be shot.
Boler initiates the "double-double" watch. "Twenty-three and nine!" Meanwhile, something happens on the court, an official blows a whistle, and I have no clue what happened since I'm sitting here re-reading and re-admiring my work.
Little bunny foo-foo gets shot in the head. The only question is whether or not the shooter will stick him back in for two minutes in a show of humiliation.
I've never been a big believer in conspiracy theories, but the fact that officials are making semi-phantom calls against Fisher in an attempt to get him into foul trouble make me wonder if they're planning ahead to try to keep this game close.
Jazz down by 2. A concerned coaching staff decides to go with plan "A".
"Double-double!" *switches channel*
Fish getting worked. Bam! All over the floor. Onlookers laugh and applaud. Cilantro added on top for aesthetics and...oh wait. This is Emeril. *switches channel again*
Harp with the double-double (points, falls)
Guess Millsap already got his playoff "experience" on Saturday. Should serve him well in seasons to come.
Embarrassing moment: "‹tatermoog› Oh, crap, I forgot there was a game on. I'm watching Scrubs."
Hint: the embarrassing part isn't the fact that he forgot there was a game on.
Harpring with an MLA, ends the quarter sprawled on the floor. How fitting.
Jazz down 6. Handing the baton off to the anchor...Buckle up!
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