Quarter Three: HarpringSucks Sucks

Well, great. Here I am again.

Third quarter predictions:
-AK picks up third foul within two minutes, giving us Harp for the rest of the quarter.
-Deron picks up fouls three and four.
-Baron Davis embarrasses somebody by performing the first recorded 720 alleyoop dunk.
-Harpring will suck.
-Jessica Alba will cheer at least fifteen times at points when she is not supposed to.

-Stephen Jackson with the "quick hands." Comes from the constant practice of the stabbing motion.

-What a great pass from Derek Fisher. I don't know what to think about that. He would make a great point guard.

-Fisher MLA.

*looks at reader with Woody Allen look and sound of muted trumpet going, "Mwa-mwa-mwaaaaa."*

-AK lasted three minutes. There goes that prediction. Only 9 minutes of Harpring to go.

-Sorry for the break in commentary, I literally forgot about the game for two minutes of gametime. Harpring has that effect on me.

-Boozer just got smacked hard in one quadrant of his head. On the bright side, I think he lost a bit of his acne.

-Fisher gets the ball on the break, 1-on-2, bricks the ball off the top of the backboard, gets bailed out by the foul. If you don't like that, you don't like Jazz basketball.

-Massive MLA on Boozer. He didn't even yell "And One!" Somewhere, The Professor shakes his head sadly.

-I could swear the back of Beidritch's jersey says "Biedrins." Someone needs to fix that.

-Giricek in for Harpritch.

-Collins makes his first good defensive play of the last fifty games, gets called for the foul. I expect him to collapse in a pool of tears in tomorrow's practice. Unfortunately, no one will notice.

-I'm not 100% sure, but I don't think Giricek is going to be our Closer of the Game.

-I think the Jazz call the three-point line the "Defense Line." Because they're only allowed to play defense on players within that line.

Of course, that theory is proved inadequate once one realizes they don't play defense on players within that line, either.